Good morning/evening/wherever you are in the continuum!
I am a day late and a dollar short on this update, and frankly I don't have an excuse. I didn't feel like doing the update yesterday. So what are you going to do, sue me? (Please don't, I do not have very much money or access to a good lawyer. It would literally ruin me).
Week three has been a bit of an oddball here in the Big Brother house. I mean in China. After the whirlwind of excitement that included being a star of stage and (karaoke) screen, meeting some New Zealanders, and taking the longest walk of my life, week three started out with a bit of a whimper.
There was no summer camp this week. When I was first informed of this, I thought that this would mean that we would get a whole week off. This was exciting, intriguing, and obviously too good to be true. Since the school paid such good money for us to come out here, and also for our services for a month, they wanted to make sure that we weren't getting paid to do nothing, so they loaned us out!
I am not entirely sure of the relationship between my current place of business and the "International Kindergarten" where I spent most of my time this week, but whatever their relationship it must be a pretty good one because they sold all four of us to them for a whole week.
My first introduction to this kindergarten was actually last Thursday. We took a brief respite from the daily grind of teaching the same kids about the same turnip once again, and we (both Laura and I as well as our Greek friends) boarded a bus to a different part of town. This was a brief bus ride of only two stops, but once we got off we were in brand new territory!
Now, I enjoy walking and exploring quite a bit, and after two full weeks here I had managed to scope out a pretty big circle around our hotel. This circle encompassed everything I knew about Zhaoqing, and China in general. Things within this circle had started to look normal, and the crinkly sheen of a whole new country was starting to wear thin in that circle. A naked child peeing on a tree? Yawn. Someone selling fried duck heads on the corner? So what?
BUT THIS! Only a mile or two away was a whole new area to explore. What was in this undiscovered country? What new secrets awaited? Spoiler alert: basically more of the same. It was only a mile down the road, after all.
But on that Thursday there was excitement in the air as we walked through this fresh, virgin snow-like area of the city. A few minutes from the bus stop we turned left, and then a few minutes later we arrived at the kindergarten. The architecture of this building was something to behold. The entire thing was outside, but it was also inside of a building. To be a little more clear, you had to go through a door to enter the school, but the entire center of the building was outside. Everything that wasn't the classrooms was like a giant courtyard. The classrooms took up an impressive three stories, which caused the feeling of being inside-outside to be even more pronounced. The classrooms, offices, library, kitchen, performance center, and swimming pool (I know, right? for a Kindergarten?) were all along the perimeter of the school, and each had their own four walls and securely "Indoorsy" feel.
One side effect of putting the outside on the inside at this school was that there was absolutely no escape from the butt-meltingly hot days. As if trying to prove something that I was way too dumb and way too hot to understand, the weather in China hit highs that it had not yet hit since we left the States during the week that I worked at the Kindergarten. 104 was pretty much how it was every single day. Luckily the different classrooms had air conditioning units, but unluckily most of the teachers didn't turn the units on at all because they had small oscillating fans that did absolutely nothing. I'm pretty sure that these teachers were actually demons, and believe me I have some evidence to back this up.
But anyway, we arrived on that balmy Thursday and were given a tour of the place. Our Greek friends were familiar with this Kindergarten because they had been asked to work here during similarly slow times in the past. We were introduced to the lovely principal of the school, who spoke absolutely zero words of English, but she had a nice smile. She reminded me starkly of my grandmother. I think it was how she wore her hair and how she walked. Actually, as an aside, a lot of people in China remind me of my grandmother. I can't quite put a finger on it, and I'm positive my grandma isn't Chinese at all, but that's the honest truth.
After the tour we were led into the auditorium where a big to-do was being put on. We were asked to sit in the front row, and after I found my seat I took in my surroundings. I tried to piece together what exactly was going on. Why were we here on this Thursday afternoon, if not to teach? Why were there so many adults here? Why did it feel like more people were staring at me than usual (and that's saying something)?
Eventually the show began, and I was treated to a nearly innumerable series of 30 second piano solos and duets by 6 year olds. These were interspersed by a collection of dance numbers that were mildly amusing, if not mildly, unintentionally racist. One such song, for example, was "1 Little, 2 Little, 3 Little Indians", and they were all dressed up as Native Americans, but also as Cavemen. They didn't seem to understand the difference.
I slowly realized that this was very similar to the show that was being put on my the children at OUR school as an "end of camp graduation". In fact, it was almost identical, give or take one obvious turnip-shaped hole in the programming. This is a graduation, I realized, and before I put the final nail in the coffin on what we were doing there, the principal came up on stage and asked us to join here. She introduced us, in Chinese, as the foreign teachers who had been teaching the kids all year! The parents gave us a standing ovation!
Afterwards, we were mobbed by the parents who forced their children to take pictures with us. Children, who I had not even seen in the recital, let alone ever before in my entire life, were being thrust hastily into my arms and asked to post for family photos!
I later learned from the Greeks that this is a little bit of a fib that's somewhat common in China. It's called, somewhat cheekily, "White face". Basically we were being paid to come and stand around, and to make the school look good, and to make the parents feel like they were getting good value on the money they spent enrolling their kids in this school.
So when this most recent week rolled around, we did a heck of a lot more white face. Ultimately, for the entire work day, there was only 1 lesson that the foreign teachers were expected to each; the lesson itself was also only 30 minutes long. For the rest of the work day we were allowed to do whatever we wanted, whether it was play with the kids, just walk around the school, or even sit in the (highly air conditioned) "Foreign Teachers Office". The most important part of the work day, however, was at 8 in the morning and at 5:30 in the evening, which was when the parents dropped off and picked up their kids, respectively.
During drop off/pick up time, we were expected to be out and about and very visible in the school. In the morning we had to stand at the door and greet every child (and especially the parent), and then in the afternoons we had to be in one of the classrooms playing with the kids when their parents arrived to take them home.
This felt a little bit sketchy for a while, but I eventually came to terms with it. Yes, I was being somewhat dishonest to the parents of the children, and that still niggles slightly deep down in my gut somewhere (where I probably still have a shred of a conscience left). However, I realized that I was just doing what was expected of me, and everyone was leaving happy. I was keeping busy, learning about China, playing with kids and maybe teaching them a little bit, and being paid. My bosses were feeling like they were getting good value for their money for hiring me. The Kindergarten got to look good, and the parents get to feel like they are sending their kids to a good school. Everyone wins. Plus, the kindergarten was very specific about what to teach/how to teach it during the 1 lesson per day. We essentially just read out of a book for 30 minutes and the kids repeated it, then we watched a dvd with a related song. I took some solace in the fact that, whether or not we were there teaching the entire day, the kids would have gotten the same lessons from us.
Perhaps you do not agree that this is an okay practice. I am not entirely sure I've convinced myself. That's okay. I'm just going to keep doing the best that I can, and keep an open mind about it.
So how exactly did I spend my week? Well, largely, I stayed the heck in that air conditioned office! I read two books and practiced my Chinese flash cards a lot. Every few hours I would feel really guilty about being paid to do nothing, so I would go to a classroom and play with the kids a little bit until I go so hot that I wanted to die. I also played with the children at recess, and they seemed to really like me. The other thing I did a lot of was play the piano. I found one in the room labeled "Library", and there was a book of moderately difficult songs in the bench.
All in all it was a very good week. I read Rob Delaney's autobiography and laughed/cried a lot. I also read a book full of first-hand accounts about life growing up in North Korea during the 90s. This book was incredible/interesting/sad/terrifying, and there was an added layer of complex feelings on top of that because I kept remembering that I'm only about 500 miles from North Korea right now.
Since there were so many of us teachers, and they only actually needed one person at the Kindergarten, they split us up into groups of two. Whenever we weren't at the Kindergarten, we were at the Bosskids school in the mall doing 1-on-1 tutoring with some teenagers.
I worked with 2 teenagers this week. One was a 19 year old girl and one was a 15 year old boy. They were both quite good at English already, and were both planning on moving to English speaking countries for school. The girl was moving to Australia in a the fall to go to University in Cairns, and the boy was being sent to a boarding high school in New Jersey in 6 days (actually his plan leaves in a few hours if I remember correctly).
So, since their English was already quite good, we spent most of the time just chatting. I talked to the boy a lot about what America is like. We also worked on some good travel words and phrases (like 'boarding pass' and 'airsickness bag'!). Humorously, I learned on Friday that the boy who was going to move to New Jersey had already been to America like 5 times, and has actually been to more states than I have. So now I really have no idea where he was doing there getting tutoring.
On the last day (after the above revelation), I decided to work with the boy on his reading comprehension and listening skills, so we took turns reading to each other from my Kindle, and I would ask him questions every few minutes about what was going on. We started with Harry Potter, but it was a little too advanced for his English reading level. We eventually switched to Roald Dahl, which was much more his speed. This kid, who was a typical teenager and was too cool for school, was losing his SHIT over the story of how much Charlie Bucket loved chocolate, and the story of how Willy Wonka built a chocolate palace for an Indian prince. He was so enthralled in the story that when it was time to end class he did an audible sigh! I told him to check out the movies. I said that the first one was better, but that the remake had Johnny Depp in it (who he said was his favorite actor). I'll probably never see or hear from him again, but I hope he went and watched at least one of those movies.
All in all it was a very relaxed week. We didn't have the same dressing requirements for work, so I got to wear much more comfortable clothes.
On Saturday night we went over to our friend Cynthia's parents house for dinner. Her parents were very nice, even though they didn't speak any English. Her mother spoke Mandarin, so I was able to thank her for dinner and tell her it was very good, which she got a kick out of. Mostly Cynthia translated or we communicated with gestures and smiles.
Honestly, it was very good too! She kept insisting that the food was "simple" and "a small meal", but there was way more food than we could finish. There was a giant bowl of Chinese lettuce, a giant bowl of Liang Bian (the cold cucumber stuff), a giant bowl of pork and onions, a giant bowl of duck, a soup pot full of chicken and mushrooms, and also a heaping plate full of whole shrimp (heads and everything!). There was more food that the five of us could finish. If any of you know me personally, you know that if there's more food than I can eat, that it is a lot of food indeed.
Cynthia's dad also opened a bottle of wine, which we split between him, Laura, and I. It was also good, and a great bonding experience. Even though we could say 0 words to each other, we were best buddies by the end of the evening.
After dinner we watched TV. There is a special channel on Chinese TV that broadcasts from Hong Kong that is the "American News Channel". It just plays 60 Minutes all day, and then a few Chinese shows with English subtitles. This is hilarious to me for some reason.
What we ended up watching was a game show where 6 contestants from all over the world are brought over to China and then given a crash course in Mandarin. After their brief studies, they are brought on the show and then quizzed on culture, music, and language. It was entertaining but the concept is kind of bizarre to me. I tried to imagine how it would go over in the US if we had a show where we brought like 3 people from South America and 3 people from the Middle East and then gave them 6 English lessons and then a quick history and pop music class and then quizzed them and laughed at their mistakes. I don't think it would go over well.
This is not to say that the show was mean spirited, racist, or anti-the rest of the world in any way. It was very Chinese, and a lot of fun to watch. I just don't think that a concept like that would fly back home.
So that was pretty much our entire week. We spent the weekend recuperating and doing laundry. On Saturday we took a walk south to the riverfront. Zhaoqing is sandwiched between a lake and a river, and we hadn't seen the river yet. We walked along the river until we came to a big leaning tower. I'm not sure how big the one in Pisa is, but this one was pretty cool to see up close. We wanted to go and check it out at the base and try to get inside, but like many landmarks over here, the entrance was gated and you had to pay a fee to get in. We took some pictures though.
All in all, this week felt like the first week of really living here. Week 1 was all about the shock and awe of a new place, and week 2 felt like settling in, but now it's past week 3 and we're just living here.
Until next time, Gan Bei! Bottoms up!
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